Anyone can dream.
Success sometimes start with a dream.
But some dreams lead to nightmares.
Today is Saturday. Last thursday i felt ill, as always as i am at Los Banos when i am not taking vitamins. With sleepless nights to meet deadlines, I dont have the perseverance to sustain days without the support of those pills. Neglecting that fact resulted to my failure of submitting my first draft on Friday, after two weeks of trying to figure out how results of my study be presented. Should I use graph or tables, should I include this in the presentation or just place it at the appendices, what could be the possible reason why the result is like this, is the statistical analysis already enough? Whole day of Friday, i spent the day sleeping.
Around 10 pm I woke up to drink milk and ate 2 slices of Gardenia whole wheat bread (my constant company to satisfy hunger between meals) as I felt empty. I brushed my teeth again and went back to sleep.
I was at home. I just came in from racing playfully with 2 buses who passed at the highway bringing clouds of dust as the road was newly graded after the old cemented road was cleared for a new road brought by the program of GMA (was that dama ko ang kaunlaran sa bagong daan). I even shouted at them laughing "i wont eat your dust". At the corner, I met my one neighbor, I ask "where are you going, ate?"
"In _______ (I forgot the place she mentioned). Are you still working with your old boss?" I said, yes. Looking at her, she is not the neighbor I supposedly knew. She brought with her 2 transparent bags with 2 dresses in hangers in one bag and several items on smaller hangers on the other bag. I dont know a neighbor that this executively dressed up and seems to be going to a conference or a big meeting. How come she knew my boss and could she possibly knew where I worked? Or does she really knew me?
I found my older sister and my nephew in the house. I saw my nephew covered with sores again over his body. I thought this was already cured long time ago. I heard she was talking with my father. How come my father is here again? Why we didnt bring him out when my younger sister visited us? Why only our mother was with us? We can bring the wheel chair if he cant walk but as I can see him, he is in good shape. Ahh, maybe because because he is already dead.
Will it be possible that he stays with us without our neighbor necessarily know it or we will just deny that he is not with us though he is really with us? One neighbor may say, oh, I saw you and your father visiting your farm. I will just say, But I am alone.....
This cant be true. According to Ecclesiastes 9:5-6 "For the living know that they will die, but the dead know nothing; they have no further reward, and even the memory of them is forgotten. Their love, their hate and their jealousy have long since vanished; never again will they part in anything that happens under the sun". Psalm 146:4 further confirmed that "when their spirit departs, they return to the ground; on that very day their plans come to nothing." This is not real.. My father is already dead.
I rose from my bed and prayed, "Oh, God guide us to see the truth and guide us on everything, I only believe in you". A massive energy was pressed upon me, so heavy that I cannot move. I can hardly breath. I raise my hand as if to push away that force pinning me down.
As I tried to open my eyes, in my half-opened eyes, I saw a well-lit coffin adorned with 2 bright incandescent bulbs at both ends. It was blocking the way out my room. Though, there was nobody inside the coffin, terror overwhelmed me. I cried out, "Oh, Lord help me " and wailed.
I felt somebody's pulling my leg and the other one shaking my shoulders.
I woke up.
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